It’s raining. Even though the days are longer and the warmth lingers, I cannot help but feel a quiet, painful stirring. I don’t know and I don’t understand why.
Maybe it’s that time again when I feel the need to retreat, when I feel that I don’t have much time to rest, that I crave that solitude to get me closer to myself again. I feel that that the new people around me, the current situations, the social life, have forced me once again to look at my behavior and my attitude. What makes me me? Who am I through your eyes? Why can’t I or you be the one?
Have I erred in any way? Or it’s just the circumstances? It’s a kind of pride to think that I will always be righteous, that I am not held accountable for my life, because I feel that I am not susceptible to flaws. But I laugh at myself, laugh at how stupid I am, because that’s the only thing I can do. I do the same things over again, like a rerun on the TV set.
“Even if love breaks me down again, I’ll take the pain, it’s a kind of pride
誰讓我擁抱 誰讓我 瘋狂的心跳“
I don’t know and I don’t understand why it has to be her. I don’t understand what I’ve done wrong or what I haven’t done? Will I always play the supporting role? I just don’t understand; where have I erred? What did I miss? What did I do? What did I didn’t do?
“There will be someone, a new happiness
一定會有一個人 一段新的美好”
Sometimes, I see my life playing itself like a music video, with some sappy “you can do it” song playing over my life. These people sing of new loves, of break-ups, of friendships. Who will write a song about unrequited affections? Who will write a song that will mirror my frustrations and my failures?
“I’m fine now, I can start over again
我 現在很好 可以重新起跑”
Quotes from Rene Liu’s “I’m Fine” album, from “I’m Fine” Track 1
